So here I am, in the last few weeks of my first trimester – which is both exciting and worrisome. Exciting because soon we’ll be out of the so called ‘Danger Zone’ (although I appreciate you’re never fully out of that, there’s always the possibility of something going wrong) and also we’ll be able to tell the world! Worrisome because we’re so close to the second trimester that I’ve almost convinced myself that something is going to go wrong….but I guess that’s part of pregnancy/motherhood – constant worry! I know I’m being silly but I can’t seem to help it!
So what’s happened in the last week, other than being constantly worried…well…I’ve discovered a craving for chicken chow mein – could be a lot worse I suppose, at least it’s not sugar or butter or something really odd like jellied eels?! I’ve also only been waking up once in the night to go to the loo, rather than twice as usual – could it be that my uterus is starting to lift, so there’s less pressure on my bladder?
I’ve been wondering if I’m starting to show as well, but I think that’s all in my head. Having been somewhat overweight before I got pregnant (BMI 29.5) I know that it simply isn’t possible for me to be showing yet but, according to the app (WhatToExpect) the baby is the size of a lime this week?!
I’ve got two work dinners this week, with the two teams that I work with, and I’ve been contemplating telling them our news – partly because I’m almost 12 weeks and partly because otherwise I’ll have to lie about why I’m not drinking alcohol: I’ve managed to avoid work social events up to now but I can’t get out of these ones. I’ve suddenly become very nervous that something is going to go wrong, which is why I’m now not too sure about telling them. I have my NHS scan in less than two weeks, so maybe I’ll wait until then..I might just have to wait and see how I feel on both days.
I’ve also started thinking about work and discussing it all with my husband…how long I want to go on maternity leave for…how long we can afford for me to be off…what will happen to my job…will I be able to still do my job and have a little one at home…what familial support options do we have…what about childcare…etc…some quite serious conversations! But important ones, nonetheless…
In other news there have been some rather strange sensations going on – popping and twinges, also aching around my ribs – I guess everything is stretching and getting ready for the second trimester! Will keep you updated, of course…!